If Only Every Day Could Feel Like a New Romance Book!


Why do we have so much trouble appreciating daily living? As a positive psychologist I wish I could say that for most of us everyday feels great.  Unfortunately that is not the case.  Most of us go through an ordinary day almost by rote.  We get up the same time, we eat the same breakfast or no breakfast, rush to work, and then proceed to get through another day.  Once in a blue moon the day is lush, full of fun and excitement.  Perhaps that is the day special friends visit, or the first day of our vacation, or the day we get wonderful medical news and the world just seems to expand and open up for us again. 

The real question from my vantage point as a positive psychologist is why everyday can’t be more like a good romantic novel?  Why can’t everyday have some zing to it and the color and expectations that are similar to what we often feel when we are reading a romance?  We aren’t even the participants.  In fact we are merely voyeurs.  And in reality, unless the book is a memoir, the characters themselves are ficticious.  Yet in this fantasy world where the players are not real and we are just watching, we are able to let go and have such a good time!  I know that first hand having just written Next Year in Jerusalem, Part 1 and 2.  I enjoyed creating the fictional characters and so many people love reading their romantic ups and downs and all the rest that they face in terms of mystery and spiritual unrest.

What a strange kettle of fish, the human mind is!  But all is not lost.  It is possible to make more of our days feel as great as the way we feel reading a new romance book.

Here are two  ideas for you to play with:

1. Give up the notion of multi-tasking for at least part of each day.  Research has proven that us humans don’t multi-task very efficiently and we also loose an in depth connction of ‘being there’ to whatever we are doing when we try to do more than one thing at once.

2. Stop and feel your world a few times a day for even a minute.  Just stop and look around.  Right now I ‘see’ the sun shining on my neighbors truck and house and the effect of the shadows because I stopped for a moment.  It is amazing how one shadow is such a straight line against the white siding.  Oh, no, the sun went in and now the line is gone as if it hadn’t ever existed.  I never would have noticed if I hadn’t taken a minute to ‘be’ in my world.

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