What’s the Difference Between The Enchanted Self and a Romance Book?

Posted on 14th May 2013
in Happiness, New Romance Novels, Next Year in Jerusalem! Part 1, Next Year in Jerusalem! Part 2, Romantic Fiction
by Barbara Holstein

THE ENCHANTED SELF is a psychological concept that I, as a positive psychologist, developed over many years, after researching woman not in my practice. The research led to my discovery that woman are able to enjoy positive states of being, both in mind and body, much more than they talk about and more than the media or even ourselves give us credit for. We have these secret capacities that if we are not careful we even hide from ourselves! These capacities are complex and involve that use of positive memories, and the self recognition of one’s talents, strengths and potential. These capacities also require practice and support, both externally and internally.

What is the result? It is beautiful. It is the living of an Enchanted Life. That means a life where a woman accesses again and again what we call in lay person’s terms: Happiness. It means also that the woman makes good decisions and lives a life of integrity so that her happiness is not interrupted by big mistakes that could take her down.

So, that’s The Enchanted Self and you can read all about it and start to use it for yourself in THE ENCHANTED SELF, A Positive Therapy.

But how does that tie into Romance, Mystery, and Spiritual Awakenings? All the things that Next Year in Jeusalem! brings alive through Maggie and Natalie.

There is a clear connection. Think of a dentist going to dental school. You don’t care what he learned, you just want him to fix your teeth or give you some simple ways of keeping your teeth and mouth healthy. Same with psychological theory.

We don’t need to know as much about the theories of development and memory and accessing human potential when we go about daily life, as I need to know as a psychologist. We just need to know how to access happiness in daily life.

And that’s where my romance novel comes in. Happiness to most women is a combination of romance, relationships, staying healthy, making good decisions, raising children, looking forward to things like vacations, imagining what could have been, dealing with what is, etc.

For example, watch my short video where I discuss what has happened to Natalie:

So the best way to actually get to learning more about Happinesss can be through understanding and talking about the issues that bigger than life characters actually go through. Sex and the City gave us lots to talk about as far as best friends, men, etc. but most of us wouldn’t have really wanted to date on and off for years, particularly feeling all the emotions that Carrie had to go through. But we love watching her story and relating it to our own. Natalie and Maggie also give us lots to talk about. A flirtation with a guy from the past, when you are married is always dangerous. But so interesting to analyze and learn from when it is someone else! Divorce is bitter in most cases. But again, so interesting, when it involves a charming character like Maggie who is struggling to get her identity back after a bad marriage.

I’ll be back with more on this subject!

Tags: Case study research with women, Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, The Enchanted Self